question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
