if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
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