R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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