Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
