just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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