Well douche your snatch and let's go!
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
