Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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