Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
