Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Randomize
