Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
