yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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