No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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