dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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