her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
You were trust falling into bushes
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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