at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize