Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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