I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
