Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
