Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
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