You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
