I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize