Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
