if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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