omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
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Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
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