You really coming over, don't trick.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize