I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I think people are normalizing furries
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize