If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
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