Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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