If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
17 year olds will be the death of me.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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