I hate all girls vehemently.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Randomize
