No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize
