You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
