omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
