I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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