Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
