i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
