im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
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