Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
