I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Houston, we have a blender
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Randomize
