Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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