Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Randomize
