i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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