therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
If its not for food we ain't going out.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize