OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
