I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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