Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
i now understand why vodka
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize
