some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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