I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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