let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
