i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Randomize
