I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize
