And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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